MEETING SELF – A REAL SELFIE

 

                    "Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom." Aristotle

 

In the contemporary world, everyone seems too engaged in taking "selfies" with great passion and fixation. Everyone wants to look good (mainly to show it to others !).

 

The question is – What is a real Selfie? It certainly is much beyond taking a self-picture. A real Selfie is "knowing yourself". Very few know themselves well or are aware of their thoughts, words and even actions – This may appear a silly statement, but it is true!

 

How often do we "Meet Ourselves ?". We must 'know' and 'find' ourselves first, and the rest will follow. We think, say & act – but we do not undertake the real journey within.

 

What, then, is "Meeting Self"? It is exploring ourselves. It is becoming aware of our emotions, prejudices, love, apprehensions, strengths, weaknesses, fears & aspirations. This journey is not just tricky but inconvenient, too! Remember – others see a personality outwardly, and individuality exudes from within.

 

Ralph Emersion once wrote: "What lies behind us and before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us". 

 

Meeting Self is 'accepting' ourselves as 'we are'. The acceptance has to be unconditional. We must accept our flaws and shortcomings as much as our positive attributes. We should stop judging ourselves. Self-acceptance ultimately leads to self-esteem, which is crucial for a happy life. 

 

Self-acceptance has been recognized by several religions, spiritualities, psychological theories, and therapies as "a catalyst for the alleviation of emotional misery as well as an energizer supporting growth towards happiness and fulfilment". 

 

A step further is to 'love' oneself. Oscar Wilde said: "To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance." If you do not love yourself, you cannot love others; if you cannot heal yourself, you cannot heal others. Realize that everyone is different and unique, and so are you. Do not compare yourself with others. You need not look for validation from others.

 

Even more important is that this will help us unhook from what we think 'others' think. Many of us are too preoccupied with what others will think of us. Such a mindset consumes us fully.

 

Meeting Self is also being aware of the areas we need to improve upon. If we think the world needs to change – we must look within and change ourselves first. 

 

All of us are pretty aware of the famous quote by Gandhiji; "You be the change you want to see in the world". Sometimes, we must die inside to rise from our ashes to become a new person. If we search for someone to change our lives, look into the mirror!

 

I have come across people who are so calm and comfortable with themselves; they do not try to impress others and are so good at making balanced decisions. They constantly 'meet' themselves. The reason is that there is no inner war raging in them. The energy thus saved is well-channelled. 

 

Meeting Self and loving Self will elevate us towards SELF AWARENESS. Life becomes happier and more meaningful as Self – Awareness helps us to improve in several ways. We can control our thoughts and feelings in a much better way. Our attitude becomes more poised and balanced. We can accept ups and downs without much emotional euphoria or turmoil. 

 

Another positive outcome of Self Awareness is handling praise and criticism with a similar mindset. Inner harmony eventually gives us good health and happiness.

 

George Bernard Shaw went even a step ahead. He said: "Life is not about finding yourself but about creating yourself". The self-creation demands a serious Self – Meeting, Self – Acceptance & Self – Awareness. (Albeit difficult, but not impossible.) To be created by ourselves, we need the courage to accept our flaws and work positively to rectify them. 

 

Self–creation has another dimension too. Many times, we are taken for granted because of our gullibility. We often run into a problem because we said YES when we wanted to say NO. Paul Coelho remarked: "When you say YES to others, make sure you are not saying NO to yourself". We can change to be more forthright and fearless to call a spade a spade. What is needed is an intense 'Self–meeting'.

 

 'Meeting Self' in a real sense is much beyond what we discussed. As many sages emphasize, you are living in the space of an empowered conscious creator. The Self Awareness is a quest to get an answer – 

Who am I? 

 

That brings us to Meditation – the actual quest for the ultimate truth. Every human has to have an 'ikigai' - a Japanese word for finding the purpose (An insightful book, Ikigai has lots to say on this aspect). Self -Exploration will help you to find your 'ikigai'.

 

In 6th Chapter of Bhagwat Gita, Lord Sri Krishna says:

 

ॐ यदा विनियतं चित्तमात्मन्येवावतिष्ठते । 

निःस्पृहः सर्वकामेभ्यो युक्त इत्युच्यते तदा ॥

"Those who aspire to the state of yoga should seek the Self in inner solitude through Meditation. With body and mind control, they should constantly practice one-pointedness, free from expectations and attachment to material possessions. The practice of Meditation frees one from all affliction. This is the path of yoga. Follow it with determination and sustained enthusiasm. Renounce all selfish desires and expectations wholeheartedly, and use your will to control the senses. The mind will become still in the Self through patience and repeated effort."

 

We make our destiny. The first step in that journey is to KNOW OURSELVES.

            

Should we not be obsessed with our REAL SELFIE?