HOW MUCH IS ENOUGH?

 

     “He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what 

      he would like to have.”       Socrates

            

‘Discontent’ is the ubiquitous behaviour of the society at large. No one seems to be happy with what one has! Be it money, home, bodies, job, clothes or anything… Everyone is in a run to get more and more. Not only do we want more for ourselves but more than others. That then sets an endless rat race. Even if we feel we have won the race, we still are rats !!

 

Greed is a bottomless pit. We are trapped in a never-ending cycle of wants and desires. A millionaire wants to be a billionaire, a scooter owner wants to get a car, a Maruti owner wants a Mercedes and so on…The satisfaction always remains a mirage. As the proverb goes - Many have too much but not enough. No one seems to know how much is ‘enough’ for them. 

 

A few questions in life have yet to have universal answers. The answers are predominantly subjective. "How much is Enough ? " is one such poser for human life. Only a person himself can answer – how much does he want?

 

Why are people with lots of money, power and all other worldly possessions unhappy with what they have? Why do they want more and more?

 

Researchers have been trying to use some computer models to understand the psychology of why people always want more and more material things despite the possibility that such products will entertain us momentarily. And with time, we will need something else. The findings state that we all run after rewards, and we tend to compare ourselves with various standards when we become "habituated". It is like running after a football; when the ball stops, we kick it again and run after it!

 

From ancient times, human history abounds with literature trying to answer the universal question – How to achieve everlasting happiness? Paradoxically, to date, everlasting happiness has remained elusive for most. Getting more than others is wrongly perceived as a tool for happiness. We fail to perceive that Getting what you want is pleasure (which always wants more), whereas wanting what you get is happiness.  

 

One of the possible reasons for the “want more” attribute is our hunger for so-called ‘social recognition’ and ‘enjoying others being jealous of you’ attitude. The prime focus is to impress others. The irony is that many cannot utilize even ten per cent of their possessions.

 

‘Feeling Insecure’ is also a universal trait. Having more is considered a cushion to feel secure. Needless to say this also is nothing but a trap. 

 

Is it impossible to curb the urge to get more and more? Is it difficult to change our behaviour and attitude? An answer to these perplexing questions could be found by asking ourselves a different question - Do we really know what we don’t want or need?

 

The entire world went through an unprecedented, distressing time while facing the havoc created by Covid. What Covid did was an eye-opener. Almost everyone realized the value of life and the futility of all materialistic possessions. What mattered was the love, care and support of family and friends for survival. It is ironic that we needed a crisis like Covid to understand this mantra. Unfortunately, (post covid) for most people, their innate behaviour to yearn for more is reinstated. However – albeit for a short period – we did realize what we could do without.

 

Thus it becomes crucial for every individual to decide – How much is enough for them? Gandhiji once said: “Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's needs, but not every man's greed.”   

 

Let us have a look at human life. Life can be divided into different quadrants based on the time and energy utilized.

 

The FIRST quadrant is where most people spend 80 to 90 per cent of their lives. Earning - Maximising Financial Gains and Professional Growth are the principal activities. 

 

The SECOND quadrant is the time we spend with our family and close friends.

 

The THIRD quadrant depicts the time spent for others – the community in need – Giving back to society in some form.

 

The FOURTH quadrant is the time given to pursue our passion (other than your profession) – music, sports, travelling, reading, writing, gardening, painting or anything we love.

 

The FIFTH quadrant is for the Spiritual Quest – eagerness to connect with the higher self and seek answers for human existence.

 

Just pose and introspect – how are we spending our life? The majority of people stay put in the first quadrant all their lives. Earning money is very vital and crucial. No one can argue on that. However, In the quest and zest of making money, one cannot overlook enjoying the things money ‘cannot’ buy. Hence, How much is enough for you? This becomes the most crucial question. If we don’t ask this question, we will consume our lives in the first quadrant. I am not being judgemental here. If anyone is happy staying in the first quadrant all throughout life, that is fine. It is a personal choice. 

 

At this juncture, I am reminded of what George Bernard Shaw once said: “You will be more disappointed by the things you did not do than what you did".  This is the precise point I am raising. We should not be too late to realize that our choices went wrong somewhere. 

 

If we really want to win over the impulse of “always wanting more”, there are few things we can inculcate in our lives.

 

Learn to enjoy what we have rather than grieve for what we don’t have, practice gratitude for whatever we have, stop comparing with others, understand our priorities, define what matters to us, and enjoy life's simple pleasures.

 

This certainly is no holy grail, but I have a few suggestions to ponder. Remember what Lao Tzu said – “He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough”.

 

Ultimately, it is OUR life & OUR choice. Only we can determine (if at all) -  How much is enough for us?